Oh dear diary~
today morning just had a heavy talk with mummy~ i say " just like a body, as heart and brain don stay side by side and they dont work tgt in some sense." Brain clearly know is not right. But heart say goes for it~ o great now wat again. what is status? wat friends? wat is diff btw bf or not. when all he say is "inform me,i worry". when he nt oversea or in camp. Why he want me to inform him when all he could do is get here. House nt far a 30min ride only.
Why act like care and not.
Why make me feel so contradicting.
i wanna be the one at his side to give him encouragement.
But he say i there, he cant concentration.
I know he mean it in a good way as he want come close to me and stuffs.
But i just wanna be there to encourage my love's one and help them if i could.
Come close a distractment.
Left him alone, he felt left out and i dont care.
I dont want compare or so. But just hope this heavy feeling goes away soon.
I dono wat to think and feel at this very moment.
N i nv understand why he always ask me inform him when he could be here.
N i nv understand why i couldnt be by his side encourage him and pei him when he focusing do his work or studies.
N i nv understand the sudden lots of msg and the sudden silent he gave.
Contradicting is all i could say and it really contract till i couldnt breath. I felt so upset by all. i not sure.
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